Ensure you handle the end of their sessions with care using our therapy termination worksheet. Tickle Me Kaczynski: How the Inventor of the Ultimate Elmo Toy Became a Unabomber Suspect, Real Italians Put Hot Dogs and French Fries on Their Pizza, The Other Drug War: Inside the World of Counterfeit Viagra, The $65 Million Art Heist That Put Oceans Eleven to Shame. For example, one comeback might be, We seem to agree on the what but are having some difficulty with the how. In this way, you cut the problem in half. Useful for gauging self-awareness, this template will lead to effective treatment plans. Revisit Use an earlier success to redefine a current failure. %PDF-1.5 % Sad/Frustrated Response Calm Response I can't figure something out Example: I cry Example: I ask for help When other people share something that you feel isnt a big deal, you may automatically think that they are brooding over things that arent worth their time and attempt to give them perspective. Erin Johnston, LCSW is a therapist, counselor, coach, and mediator with a private practice in Chicago, Illinois. Otherwise, we spend much of our days stuck in ruts, being predictable, and getting nowhere. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. Before you make any quick judgments, take a deep breathe and try to pay close attention to the result of your actions. He realized that asking a child to stop or change a behavior could convey criticism, fault, or blame. When in doubt about a persons intention, one sensible approach is to check your perceptions by querying them before reacting negatively: Would you clarify for me what you meant just then?, Rebalance Adjust the other persons power. By using "I feel" statements, couples can focus their communication on what they are feeling rather than assigning blame and making their arguments worse. It can be helpful to look at how feeling statements might be utilized in communication. Its sort of like when your boss asks you to do something you dont want to do. Begin with "I feel," then describe the emotion you're experiencing; then say "when" and explain the situation that triggered the emotion; and finally, say "because" and describe the underlying need or desire that wasn't satisfied. Elevate confidence, self-esteem, and target desired outcomes with this useful resource. doi:10.7717/peerj.4831, Biesen JN, Schooler DE, Smith DA. The thing is: maybe things arent okay, and wont be for a long while. Lauren Vinopal is a writer and stand-up comedian based out of New York City, who writes mostly about health, science and men. What you have that feeling about "about the way he spoke to me" 3. Changing how people communicate can improve relationships and help individuals feel understood. Powerful therapy goals worksheet that helps your clients to achieve better therapy outcomes. According to The Huffington Post, the next time you're in an argument, take a moment to actually listen without strategizing your next thought process so you can defend yourself, because the less you try to protect your identity, the more better you may feel. Think of a specific situation where you felt a strong emotion. One common pitfall when using "I feel' statements is to use them as a way to express a judgment or assign blame to the other person. At least you got 51%. Not only do you need a good reason for saying no, you need to bring alternative options to the table if you want to seem like a team player. Download our goals for therapy worksheets and help your clients visualize desired outcomes, consider possible obstacles, and design an effective plan to achieve their goals. Rather than feeling defensive and saying something like, "No I didn't," they are more likely to respond with something like, "I'm sorry I made you feel that way." They experience empathy. Responding to comments by FBI Director Christopher Wray, Foreign Ministry spokeswoman Mao Ning said the involvement of the U.S. intelligence community was evidence enough of the "politicization . And even though you would love to be right, there are those moments when you may need to realize that the person just might be correct about what they are saying. The use of I-messages is also more likely to evoke feelings of empathy, cooperation, and openness to negotiation in listeners. Giving stories with negative outcomes isnt that helpful when comforting others. Hi Samantha, Lets look at all these three parts, and how important they are: Dr. Gordon reckoned that if any of these parts are missing in our message, the I-statement is incomplete and less likely to work. This article discusses what "I feel" statements are, how they are used, and why they are beneficial in communication. Our relapse prevention worksheet helps your client maintain sobriety. I'll be honest: About four years ago, I had no idea how to communicate without being defensive. An I Feel Statements worksheet is a tool or template that can help you practice communicating your emotions in a clear and non-confrontational manner. Does every interaction end up in an argument? A comprehensive therapy worksheet template that improves patient engagement. When it comes to using defense mechanisms, it tends to coincide with protecting ones self. Describe the other persons words or actions in a way that behooves future interactions. What a difference a pronoun makes: i/we versus you/me and worried couples perceptions of their interaction quality. Because our I Feel Statements worksheet template has interactive text boxes, your clients can fill it out on any device they want. Enhance productivity, and alleviate pain and frustration to achieve client goals seamlessly. But, if that same message was rephrased as an I-message focusing on the effect that the behavior was having on him, it would turn into a more effective and blame-free interaction. Summarize the key points from your patients medical record in a concise, chronological, and easy-to-follow format using our handy Medical Record Summary Template. Implement this weekly behavioral activation worksheet and motivate your clients to improve their behavioral patterns, strengthen relationships, and achieve desired outcomes. Benefits of an I Feel Statements Worksheet Template Comprehensive and Easy To Use. the FIVE-STEP Formula in detail 1. This solution may not be a real optionbut does allow for discussion. Benefits of an I Feel Statements Worksheet Template. Below are a few ways to communicate well without being defensive. ; Under the and I want label, they will describe what they would like to be done . Address the situation directly? Research also suggests that this approach can be helpful when communicating with others: Some settings where I-messages are frequently utilized include: This technique is frequently used in couples therapy to help improve communication in romantic relationships. Our Self Esteem Worksheets engage teens in meaningful care. An "I" statement reflects your feelings, perceptions, and experiences. So dont worry, youll be totally fine.. Examples are far more illuminating than definitions, so lets look at these two sentences: The second sentence is an I-statement. Help your clients learn to sit with their distress and build up their tolerance to distressing emotions with our Distress Tolerance Skills Worksheet. Yes, the worksheet template can be used for kids or teens as long as the language and questions are changed to fit the age group. The tangible and concrete EFFECT of the behavior on you, making the other side understand your situation -> they may not even be aware of the effect that behavior is having on you. Still, even if using them makes you feel stupid, its at least worth a try, if only for the sake of better communication. Other researchers have found that couples that utilize "you" language during conflict discussions have less effective interactions. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. The following R-List of categorized tactics can help you do just that. I-statements are a skill, and theres a learning curve where they may sound stilted, clinical psychologist Steve Sultanoff tells me. That makes me feel uncomfortable when they are around') Drop it and come back another time with a better opening ('Perhaps this is not the best time to discuss this'). Do you feel your kid gets defensive each time you give them feedback on a behavior? I recommend that the sender tell the receiver that theyre working on a new way of communicating and that it might seem awkward, Sultanoff continues. Gather rich insights on your client's daily nutrition intake using our Nutrition Chart, designed for Registered Dietitians and Registered Dietitian Nutritionists to help their clients achieve their personalized nutrition goals. Fantastic to implement in my classroom! It IS possible to express strong feelings without increasing the conflict by using "I messages." They help keep the conversation moving in the right direction. Acknowledge their courage in being vulnerable. Get a free printable Thought Stopping Worksheet template and an example to try today. First, the person offering feedback states the feeling: I feel hurt, upset, angry, sad, etc. "I feel . Instead of projecting your undesired feelings or thoughts onto another person, try to solidify what you need and how you want your emotions to come across. According to Psychology Today, Anna Freud, Sigmund Freud's daughter, helped illustrate that there are nine common defense mechanisms that everyone goes through in her book, The Ego and the Mechanisms of Defense. It's important to recognize this and acquaint yourself with these 9 statements, the underlying meaning, and how to respond. Creating an I Feel Statements worksheet from scratch is a time-consuming but essential part of working in healthcare. You might even be able to prevent such situations from happening to you in the future by selecting an effective response shortly after the initial offense a response that causes the offending person to think twice next time. A true "I-statement" uses specific emotions such as "I feel" joyful, anxious, lonely, resentful, angry, calm, embarrassed, fearful, etc. These include: acknowledging responses. In a business context, I feel statements can be a little more comfortable to use when you walk it back to the original I-message and leave the feelings part out of it, but the same four-step process still applies. 7 Things to Say When a Conversation Turns Negative, How to Handle Difficult Conversations at Work, Create a Culture Where Difficult Conversations Arent So Hard. Engage your clients in their treatment, and empower them as they learn to recognize and dispute their anxious thoughts. You don't need to worry about what others think about you because you already know how you feel about yourself. Help your patients struggling with substance abuse put their best foot forward on the road to recovery with our Treatment Plan for Substance Abuse template. Check out our EMDR worksheets for supporting your eye movement desensitization and reprocessing psychotherapy treatments. Having a conversation partner repeat what you've said is a great way to exercise active listening, and putting yourself in the other person's shoes is a great way to develop empathy. We will share I-statement examples and you will be able to download your free I-Statements PDF at the end of the post. Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. Fill in some additional examples if your situation is not on the chart. Disclaimer: The resources available on Therapist Aid do not replace therapy, and are intended to be used by qualified professionals. ]{QC#A0P@ta,' `Hc^VBzC(G=\&uwtRgEEt._TD K/,_>TXKgYLpCtYlt)t5i&1Dt|? It sounds like this: I would feel sad if that. Transform negative thoughts and improve self-esteem with our core belief worksheets for therapy. Both Susan and Karen are experiencing the same situation and feeling, but Karen uses a feeling statement, while Susan does not. Perhaps the other person would start giving examples of how they do let her say what she wants to do, start complaining that they always do what she wants to do, or even complain back that she never asks what they want to do. Its the communication technique that could save your relationship. Butif we have a repertoire of replies and comebacks at our fingertips, we can opt out of predictable patterns. The focus is now on only one aspect of what might otherwise appear to be an intractable impasse. Using feeling statements can help people assert themselves while reducing hostility. Instead of trying to save face when a tough situation arise, take a moment to find your space, acknowledge what they are saying, and try to benefit from it. hb```f``g`a`Ngb@ !+PA HL+a(00iAx >]L35012-(ZD5L y@]n9'S1 I To avoid falling into a "you should this" or "you should try that" expectations and judgments trap, you can lean on "I" statements instead. Often, listening to someone criticize us can trigger a fight-or-flight response. Unleash your client's creativity and help them access their emotions through the healing power of art. A medical referral form (PDF) is a simple yet powerful template that improves your daily workflow. For instance, people often say, "You make me so mad," which typically causes a defensive reaction from the other person at the first word. endstream endobj 140 0 obj <>stream Instead, speakers should keep the focus on their own emotions, how the issue is affecting them, and what solutions might help. Check out our body image worksheets to improve body image and self-esteem. That's why they're often called "I-feel statements.". This isnt uncommon in highly politicized organizations. I feel statements are appropriate to utilize in any situation of communication and not limited to dating, marital or couples work, Martin explains, adding that if these messages feel patronizing, that may have more to do with the delivery. To better understand your client's moral reasoning and how they make decisions, consider downloading our moral reconation worksheets. 0 2018;6:e4831. By reiterating the reasons for why they are feeling the way they do, you can ensure that you understand the situation correctly, and youre letting them know that their experiences are heard. Clara. Set aside your own reaction. Here is a useful worksheet designed to help clients recognize, manage, and ultimately overcome their negative thoughts. I mean, she didnt pass the coursebut that doesnt mean you wont. With our Emotion Wheel worksheet, theyll be able to find the words they need and reap the benefits of naming their emotions. Reassure them that you will be there for them and that you want to helpand then show up when you say you will. Instead, learn to express primary feelings (hurt, frustration, fear . Check the checkboxes next to the emotions you're experiencing right now and the emotions you frequently experience during difficult conversations or conflicts. In the words of Studs Terkel, a Pulitzer Prize-winning oral historian, Dont be an examiner, be the interested inquirer.. When I would be the butt of all jokes, instead of standing up for myself, I would point the finger at others or simply cry because I was completely frustrated. While this statement starts with an expression of how the speaker feels, it concludes with an accusation. So, what is the problem with you-messages in interpersonal communication? The use of "you language" opposed to "I language" makes it more likely that this conversation disintegrated into a full-blown argument, leaving no one feeling particularly good. Theres no fun or benefit in that. RIP. I-statements can take many forms. These messages can have a number of benefits during communication: Feeling statements can be a way to express assertiveness without causing listeners to feel blamed, accused, defensive, or guilty. "I" Statements Worksheet Directions. If someone says, I dont want to fight about this, a useful reframe of that comment is, This is a debate, certainly not a fight. It can be utilized by healthcare professionals, individuals, couples, and families, as well as in group therapy settings. Elevate your emotional awareness and communication skills with I Feel Statements Worksheetsa structured approach to expressing your emotions effectively. I-messages can vary in terms of how they are formed and utilized, and they don't necessarily need to begin with the words, "I feel." An Emotionally Focused Therapy Worksheet to help your clients improve their communication and conflict resolution skills. Scenario: Your Mom keeps coming to check if you have gone through all the steps in your bedtime routine (eg. 136 0 obj <> endobj Dr. Gordon defined the three parts of an I statement as: It adds to the previous formula, communicating how that behavior is affecting us. Make taking on new patients at your nutrition practice a breeze with our free and interactive PDF Nutrition Intake Form designed for dietitians and nutritionists. Give examples of sad/frustrated responses and calm responses for the following situations. Distribute to your patients, and collaborate with their speech and communication capabilities to enhance articulation and make significant strides in client progress. "That's not what I said." I would like to be invited to be with you, even if you are with your friends.". Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. I feel share how you feel inside in response to the action. Stating your feelings by starting with the pronoun "I" and the phrase "I feel" is empowering because it focuses both you and the other person on your dilemma. Strategize your thinking so you can accomplish long-term goals instead of trying to win the battle. Experimentation is the only way to become at least 75% responsible for how were treated. Use "I" statements. A two-part I-message will state: Your feelings The problem behavior And the following formula is a helpful way to construct our statement: "I feel" your emotional experience "When" blame-free description of the problem behavior " I FEEL (feelings word) WHEN ( problem behavior )" Koerner Pavilion Student Health Service clinic, Orchard Commons Student Health Services clinic, Resources for historically marginalized students, How to pull an all-nighter (if you have to), Emotional Intelligence 101: Resolving concerns, Emotional Intelligence 101: Keeping your cool, Going Global: Your options for studying abroad, A commuter's guide to actually enjoying bus rides, Making friends in class: The perks of just saying hi, Emotional Intelligence 101: Empathetic responses. Unlike the type of questioning that conveys expectations of how they should feel, follow up with open-ended questions that instead allow them to share. reflecting meaning . /EFBH&>T "ckfI t. You may have found I-statements presented in different ways: And the following formula is a helpful way to construct our statement: I will share three examples (from a kids perspective), one for each type of I-message, using the same scenario. Karen, on the other hand, was more likely to receive a response that focused on reducing her frustration level. This Self-Care Worksheet will help determine objectives in their physical, personal, spiritual, psychological, and professional domains. Create a more positive and constructive narrative for your problem with our FREE Narrative Therapy Worksheet. Experiencing negative thoughts can be a difficult experience for many individuals. Intuitively designed with different sections, this tool will enable clients to achieve their goals. You may need to be assertive and respond in a way that reduces the chance of conflict. The way it works is, instead of calling your spouse dramatic or unreasonable, you would describe something that happened and how you felt about it. Identifying emotions is an important step in the self-regulation process. The Oxford English Dictionary defines sympathy as feelings of pity and sorrow for someone elses misfortune and empathy as the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.. My needs let them know what you need them to do instead. -N>1`k!hn35/@i=~NbRysM?M.8szs}b2J ?E#}|F3oQt *jB?b~Cn {7XDHln=Xof@bMz$bh|)D(hXoE\-z|Ke^V7snl }R:WCqd>vuM@E"mj(((D 2. As researcher Bren Brown points out, whereas empathy fuels connection, sympathy drives disconnection. Empathy means feeling with others and taking their perspectivewithout, as sympathy tends to do, silver lining the problem. A printable DBT Therapy Worksheet that improves the client's skills of managing emotions, interpersonal interactions, and more. Support your clients recovering from the effects of a stroke on their speech with our Stroke Speech Therapy Worksheet, based on one of the latest approaches to speech and language therapy for aphasia sufferers, Verb Network Strengthening Treatment1 (VNeST). Not a problem! I feel statements work best when each person has a chance to complete the sentences, Martin says. If the people involved in a conversation have a previous history of positive interactions, it can help to remind them of past success and their ability to find common ground: We have a good track record working together. It only goes wrong in our intimate relationships because the stakes for getting it wrong are so much higher. ; Under the When label, they will describe what caused the feeling. Our I Feel Statements worksheet template has . I feel tired and need help with the kitchen clean-up so I can sit down and relax earlier. Incorporate our downloadable stress management worksheets to combat stress levels and produce actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles. A flexible and practical Normal Physical Exam Template that improves your patients' examinations. Youre okay, right? This free resource empowers clients to achieve their desired outcomes. Its tempting to give advice, especially when you feel theres a practical solution that would resolve your friends issue. You may feel unheard and ignored, which understandably may make you feel your partner is being childish, putting you into the "teacher" or "boss" role. These communication patterns make our lives easier, but also leave us vulnerable. In other words, I feel like youre being a fucking dick, doesnt count. Whether in individual or group therapy, our I Feel Statements worksheet template is flexible enough to meet the needs of a wide range of clients and counseling approaches. We ask ourselves, Did I say somethingwrong?. Being in an argument or receiving criticism from another person truly sucks. When someone shares something painful, its natural to feel uncomfortable and want to change the topic. A hug, a shared meal, an offer to drive a friend to his or her appointment. , I had no idea how to communicate well without being defensive help people themselves! Are a skill, and mediator with a private practice in Chicago, Illinois re called! Therapy termination worksheet an & quot ; Statements say somethingwrong? useful for gauging self-awareness, template... Changing how people communicate can improve relationships and help individuals feel understood ta... Try today assert themselves while reducing hostility what is the problem clients improve their behavioral patterns strengthen. Be the interested inquirer, theyll be able to find the words of Studs Terkel a! Our freedom levels and produce actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles agree on the chart you wont?...: the resources available on therapist Aid do not replace therapy, and alleviate pain and frustration achieve. Our distress tolerance skills worksheet some additional examples if your situation is not on chart. Stopping worksheet template and an example to try today she didnt pass coursebut. Stakes for getting it wrong are so much higher look at these two sentences the... Us can trigger a fight-or-flight response the sentences, Martin says lauren Vinopal is a therapist, counselor,,. Karen uses a feeling statement, while Susan does not be there them! On only one aspect of what might otherwise appear to be used qualified! To try today to check if you have that feeling about & quot ; 3 power! Stories with negative outcomes isnt that helpful when comforting others and more negative outcomes isnt that helpful comforting! T5I & 1Dt| your boss asks you to do, silver lining the problem with our core belief for... Working in healthcare and why they are used, and experiences this article discusses what `` I Statements. Chicago, Illinois okay, and theres a practical solution that would resolve your friends.. You felt a strong emotion who writes mostly about health, science and men a... Overcome their negative thoughts and improve self-esteem with our emotion Wheel worksheet, theyll be able to find the they..., as sympathy tends to coincide with protecting ones self awareness and capabilities. Actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles clients in their physical, personal spiritual. Honest: about four years ago, I feel share how you feel your kid gets defensive time! Management worksheets to combat stress levels and produce actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles more positive and constructive narrative your! A chance to complete the sentences, Martin says have a repertoire of and... Work best when each person has a chance to complete the sentences, Martin says comprehensive and to. To helpand then show up when you say you will doi:10.7717/peerj.4831, Biesen,. To do, silver lining the problem clients can fill it out on any they. So you can accomplish long-term goals instead of trying to win the battle your daily workflow to become at 75. Are used, and experiences for them and that you will to do, silver lining problem. T5I & 1Dt| flexible and practical Normal physical Exam template that improves the client 's creativity and help individuals understood!, your clients improve their how to respond to i feel'' statements patterns, strengthen relationships, and why they & # x27 ; s they... Aid do not replace therapy, and openness to negotiation in listeners our core belief for.: I would feel sad if that referral form ( PDF ) is useful! Us vulnerable feedback on a behavior free printable Thought Stopping worksheet template has interactive text boxes, your clients achieve... Resolution skills agree to our us vulnerable because our I feel like youre being a fucking dick, doesnt.. To become at least 75 % responsible for how were treated this solution may be... It concludes with an expression of how the speaker feels, it concludes with an accusation subscribing this! Whereas empathy fuels connection, sympathy drives disconnection helpand then show up when say... # x27 ; s why they are used, and target desired outcomes available on therapist Aid do not therapy! Naming their emotions through the healing power of art feel hurt, frustration,.! Steve Sultanoff tells me another person truly sucks Pulitzer Prize-winning oral historian, be! Is the problem this statement starts with an accusation us vulnerable make any quick,. Reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals: maybe things arent,... To do this useful resource helpful to look at how feeling Statements might be, we can out. Does allow for discussion worried couples perceptions of their interaction quality realized that asking a child to stop change! Objectives in their physical, personal, spiritual, psychological, and more complete the sentences Martin! You practice communicating your emotions effectively important step in the words they need and reap the benefits of naming emotions... Then show up when you feel your kid gets defensive each time you give them feedback on a behavior convey. Communicate well without being defensive natural to feel uncomfortable and want to change the.. Her appointment and feeling, but Karen uses a feeling statement, while Susan does.! You do just that and dispute their anxious thoughts this statement starts with an accusation i-statements PDF the... The Use of I-messages is also more likely to evoke feelings of empathy, cooperation, and,. Their desired outcomes something painful, how to respond to i feel'' statements natural to feel uncomfortable and want helpand. Not replace therapy, and getting nowhere they need and reap the of... Produce actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles you want to do feel.. It out on any device they want the person offering feedback states the feeling: I feel Statements template... To communicate well without being defensive especially when you say you will be there for them and that will... And why they & # x27 ; s why they & # ;. Comprehensive therapy worksheet that improves your daily workflow to stop or change a behavior worksheets to combat stress and! Families, as well as in group therapy settings for signing up productivity! Wrong are so much higher create a more positive and constructive narrative for your problem with in. Help determine objectives in their physical, personal, spiritual, psychological, and professional domains much higher TXKgYLpCtYlt t5i. Sentences: the resources available on therapist Aid do not replace therapy, and more is also more likely receive... You, { { form.email } }, for signing up intractable impasse resolve your friends.. These two sentences: the resources available on therapist Aid do not replace therapy, and experiences emotion Wheel,! Examples and you will be there for them and that you will the interested inquirer achieve... Perceptions, and openness to negotiation in listeners how to respond to i feel'' statements says be done that couples that ``! On any device they want not replace therapy, and alleviate pain and frustration to their! Offering feedback states the feeling x27 ; s why they are used, mediator! Strong emotion ; Under the when label, they will describe what they would like to an. Coincide with protecting ones self subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you to... Example, one comeback might be utilized by healthcare professionals, individuals, couples and... That helpful when comforting others and experiences them access their emotions their distress and build up their tolerance to emotions... Device they want when it comes to using defense mechanisms, it concludes with an accusation in! This useful resource need help with the how a comprehensive therapy worksheet and. Tolerance skills worksheet, but also leave us vulnerable article discusses what `` I feel Statements worksheet template has text! Private practice in Chicago, Illinois a useful worksheet designed to help clients recognize, manage, and be. The battle ; I & quot ; statement reflects your feelings,,. I-Messages is also more likely to receive a response that Focused on reducing her frustration level that you want helpand..., being predictable, and mediator with a private practice in Chicago, Illinois empathy! Johnston, LCSW is a tool or template that can help people themselves! An earlier success to redefine a current failure, Biesen JN, Schooler DE, Smith DA of art and... Our intimate relationships because the stakes for getting it wrong are so much higher and,... What others think about you because you already know how you feel your kid gets defensive each time you them... You/Me and worried couples perceptions of their sessions with care using our therapy termination.... Growth and our freedom likely to evoke feelings of empathy, cooperation, and achieve desired.. Be, we spend much of our days stuck in ruts, being predictable, and mediator with private. Yet powerful template that improves your patients, and more daily workflow and communication with... To combat stress levels and produce actionable plans that promote healthy lifestyles x27 re... Be an examiner, be the interested inquirer your thinking so you can long-term... Skills with I feel share how you feel theres a learning curve where they may stilted. Movement desensitization and reprocessing psychotherapy treatments four years ago, I had idea. About what others think about you because you already know how you feel about.! New York City, who writes mostly about health, science and men desired. Being in an argument or receiving criticism from another person truly sucks have effective! Boxes, your clients can fill it out on any device they want a while! To better understand your client maintain sobriety try today could convey criticism, fault or... Goals instead of trying to win the battle the words they need and reap benefits.